Pettiness level 5000 [update]

"HammerheadFistpunch" (hammerheadfistpunch) 06/12/2018 at 12:13 • Filed to: None

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So I temporarily work in a building with a parking garage that isn’t tall enough for the cruiser, which means I have 2 choices - Park on the street and move every 2 hours or park in one of 4 outside spots for the building. The building is 4 stories and one of the tenants is a DNR which has a couple of big trucks that also don’t fit and spend 90% of their time parked stationary.

here is a top down view. The white truck is one of the DNR trucks.

Also noted in this picture is the shitty pizza franchise known as “big Daddy’s”. Its like Little Caesars but worse in everyway if you can imagine it. Anyway I would like you to take note of its parking situation. All the spots to the south AND north of the building have signs like this one

They enforce it too. I guess thats their right, fine, even though there is literally only ever 1 spot taken up...including their customers and employees who ALL choose to park next to my building because its shaded. So instead of using the 22 fiercely defended spots they have legit claim to, they use our 4, because lazy.

Like this dipshit that JUST pulled into a spot who is one of their drivers. Now obviously I take SOME pity on the crappy pizza delivery driver in his spit and bailing wire echo (seriously, I am bummed they dropped safety inspections in my state) because he’s got it worse than me for sure...but you know what? a slightly warmer car isn’t as big a deal as being towed because you are street parked so no...on second thought, I don’t have sympathy.

So today I did this.

Yes, I took their sign and just photoshopped it and then posted it outside out building in several places. Will it stop anyone from parking there? Obviously not. Do I actually have authority to get them towed? Looking into it. Am I a petty ass? debatable.

UPDATE - Holy crap it worked!

Delivery driver moved, and that Infiniti is the owner (would ALWAYS park in our shade).

Ash78, voting early and often > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:20

1

I only know one definition of DNR and I would make friends with the guy so maybe you’ll get his trucks one day...

HammerheadFistpunch > Ash78, voting early and often 06/12/2018 at 12:22

1

I guess I don’t know that definition. Department of Natural Resources.

E92M3 > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:22

5

Haha, I don’t blame you. Now it’s time to buy some of these. A pizza delivery driver can not afford to get their car out of impound.

e6I3wxJ9_XKhmujweyu3uyhPmkQaAvQ6EALw_wcB

At the very least he will be tired of trying to get these off. The glue used is a bitch to get off

random001 > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:23

8

Do not resuscitate.

lone_liberal > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:23

1

When it comes to parking pettiness is par for the course. Right now I’m pissed because the company that owns the lot I park in closed it for maintenance and instead of allowing people with passes for that lot to park in one of their other lots they want us to pay them twice. Once for the passes we already have and again for the lots we’re forced to use while the normal one is closed. We are not amused.

HammerheadFistpunch > random001 06/12/2018 at 12:24

1

ah! yeah.

atfsgeoff > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:24

11

That’s not being petty at all.

Since your neighboring business is not allowing others to use their parking spaces, AND using yours, they are effectively monopolizing the available parking. You are simply trying to reclaim your business’s rightful parking spaces.

HammerheadFistpunch > lone_liberal 06/12/2018 at 12:24

0

yeah thats pretty scummy.

OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:24

0

My wife is a nurse so I read it as “Do Not Resuscitate” as well haha.

HammerheadFistpunch > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars 06/12/2018 at 12:25

1

could also be Does Not Run.

Ash78, voting early and often > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:26

3

Ahhh, that was actually my second guess. Every state has slightly different names for stuff. 

But it was sort of the opposite when I started hearing about “BLM protests” and thought “What’s that Bureau of Land Management up to now?!”

HammerheadFistpunch > atfsgeoff 06/12/2018 at 12:29

1

Im genuinely hoping I can get a car towed today. These guys are terrible neighbors. We see their employees drinking and smoking weed all the time because our glass is one way and a parking lot is not a private place, they also like to throw up in our bushes right in front of where I work...which is lovely.

His Stigness > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:29

0

My ideal workplace has large, shaded, and just nice reserved spots for every employee. I hate that the first thing I have to do every morning is worry about where I’m going to park my car for nine or ten hours. And it drives me nuts that employers never think about something so simple, yet so important.

boredalways > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:30

1

“Am I a petty ass? debatable.”

No, you aren’t petty and you’re having a little passive-aggressive fun at other’s expense. No harm no foul.

For Sweden > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:35

0

Better idea: cut a deal with a local tow company and enforce the sign.

BrianGriffin thinks “reliable” is just a state of mind > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:36

1

I’m more intrigued how a parking garage could be so constructed that a ~6’ vehicle is too tall to fit. Like, how claustrophobic is it?

functionoverfashion > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:36

1

That seems perfectly reasonable to me.

At my work, there is a building shared by us and a bank. The parking spaces around it are hilarious. Two giant rows that are usually 1/4 filled with bank employees and 1/4 filled with random other people, then one bank customer; then one big row with an individual sign for nearly every space. Inexplicably, two are also for the bank, even though they have 27 others around the corner. And a few are also inexplicably unlabeled. Like a free turn in a board game. Those are almost always taken.

HammerheadFistpunch > His Stigness 06/12/2018 at 12:37

1

Normally parking in SLC is easy peasy. Plenty of garages and open space and in case that fails generous street parking but for some reason the 6 spots on the south of my building are 2 hours only and the parking garage is super short. I will be moving into a brand new building with a gated parking garage in august that will be more than twice as close to my home, and doesn’t include areas like the ones here, one of which we call “stabby alley”.

So looking forward to that.

HammerheadFistpunch > For Sweden 06/12/2018 at 12:38

0

Checking with the building manager now if we can enforce our parking (obviously my sign isn’t binding but that doesn’t mean our parking isn’t protected)

thejustache > Ash78, voting early and often 06/12/2018 at 12:40

0

Yeah, my mom is a nurse and my wife has been watching lots of ER lately. Totally read it as “Do no resuscitate” as well

Alfalfa > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:40

6

You think that’s petty?

I once had a bit of a parking fued in the last apartment complex I ever lived in. Someone kept taking my assigned spot, and our new corporate lazy-ass management were really dragging their feet to do something about it. I left them notes, they would throw them on the ground. Finally I got permission to call the tow company on them, on the day I moved out. Didn’t even care, I just wanted to see the bastard towed. And I did. I watched from inside the Uhaul as the damn Malibu got hooked and towed away, at this point for no other reason than spite.

beautimouse > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars 06/12/2018 at 12:40

1

Same here (wife is an FNP) so I read it exactly as you did.

HammerheadFistpunch > BrianGriffin thinks “reliable” is just a state of mind 06/12/2018 at 12:40

0

very. That blue F150 up front will fit, but only if you take off the antenna and hope and pray a little. its less than an inch in spots. My cruiser will fit without the roof rack but its summer, I use it and its more a pain to take it on and off than it is to park outside.

For Sweden > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 12:41

6

Every sign is enforceable if you are brave enough

HammerheadFistpunch > Alfalfa 06/12/2018 at 12:43

2

I await that day with great excitement...and several cinema level cameras. 4k60p spite awaits!

random001 > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 13:06

0

Or Do Not Remove

vicali > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 13:06

2

You should just order a pizza across town then take his spot..

HammerheadFistpunch > vicali 06/12/2018 at 13:08

0

No need (updated). Though that is a great idea.

OPPOsaurus WRX > Alfalfa 06/12/2018 at 13:09

4

petty? the bathroom at an old office never got cleaned. I didn’t want to have to touch it so I left the seat up. the secretary, who worked 3 hours a day, would come in and go right up to the bathroom. she eventually complained to me and told me I had to shut the seat cuz she didn’t want to touch it. I shut the seat and the cover so she still had to touch it. After she complained about that, I would take a shit 15 minutes before she came in so it would always be nice and ripe for her. That bathroom had no windows or fan.

vicali > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 13:20

1

I giggle at the thought of you hiding in the bushes to get us updated pictures..

HammerheadFistpunch > vicali 06/12/2018 at 13:22

1

Its a great douche blind, one way glass behind the bushes.

cmill189 - sans Volvo > BrianGriffin thinks “reliable” is just a state of mind 06/12/2018 at 13:30

0

My parking garage has an 8' entrance and a 6' exit. *SMART*

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 13:46

0

Its like Little Caesars but worse in everyway if you can imagine it.

There was a time when I considered you a credible Oppo, but now? Frozen gas station pizza is better than Little Caesar’s.

You need a different car:

E92M3 > E92M3 06/12/2018 at 13:47

0

https://www.fetpak.com//product_info.php?products_id=7607&gclid=Cj0KCQjw3v3YBRCOARIsAPkLbK5033O_xBj3ZhKYijb1xnhxHEO-e6I3wxJ9_XKhmujweyu3uyhPmkQaAvQ6EALw_wcB

His Stigness > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 13:49

1

I hope your sign works for the dumb pizza drivers. If their boss wants to be a dick and enforce no parking then they can’t take up other valuable spots.

TorqueToYield > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 13:52

1

That’s ridiculous they have 22 open spots they enforce towing on and then don’t even use them.

HammerheadFistpunch > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 06/12/2018 at 13:53

0

Its no question worse than little caesars by a long margin.

HammerheadFistpunch > TorqueToYield 06/12/2018 at 13:54

0

I think so as well.

winterlegacy, here 'till the end > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 13:54

1

Speaking of antennas -

My mother went to get her Escape inspected by a Ford dealer to figure out what in the drivetrain went wrong. As we were sitting in what amounts to the vehicular equivalent of a hospital’s waiting room, a brand spanking new F150 with all sorts of fine entry-level “dealer installed” bro mods pulls in.

The factory antenna rubs up against the roof, scraping all the way. There’s about three inches between the top of the truck and the ceiling.

They could bother to sink all that funding into the showroom, yet couldn’t spare a dime for the service department.

Chariotoflove > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 13:54

5

I’m glad that you did this. I have had so many people abuse handicap parking, even my personal reserved spot. When people have done that, I have had to hunt for a spot and trek up to a quarter mile in some instances to get where I need to be. I once had the pleasure of calling for towing and arriving back at the perfect time to see the truck hooking up the offender and the owner trying to talking him out of taking his car. I didn’t even try to hide my smile. Am I petty? Maybe. Don’t care.

HammerheadFistpunch > Chariotoflove 06/12/2018 at 13:57

3

You 100% did the right thing there. taking up handicap spots is low. I don’t recall if we’ve talked about this or not but I lived with my folks for a year while my dad was digressing with ALS. He had a braun ramp van and I learned first hand your plight and I was amazed how much it mattered and shocked and appalled how often it didn’t matter to some people.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 14:14

0

Dude: that’s bad. One thing you can say about Little Caesar’s is that it’s consistent.

Chariotoflove > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 14:20

4

“But I was just running in!”

Bruce Banner has his triggers. This sentence is one of mine.

HammerheadFistpunch > Chariotoflove 06/12/2018 at 14:21

3

just. RUNNING. in....

Spanfeller is a twat > Chariotoflove 06/12/2018 at 14:42

2

You’re not being petty, those parking spaces need to be protected and anyone who uses them without the need to are sadistic and antisocial.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 14:51

0

Wait... They dropped safety inspections?!

Well, shit, I could possibly consider living there again, as long as it was somewhere nice in the mountains.

Also: This location looks very familiar for some reason.

HammerheadFistpunch > Eric @ opposite-lock.com 06/12/2018 at 14:55

0

Yup, just emissions now

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 15:05

0

That’s far more endurable.

I just can’t stand the Lake Bonneville basin. Too many bad memories and I’m severely allergic to everything that grows there.

Your building really does look familiar in an otherwise-typical UT building from the era when it was built...

Chariotoflove > Spanfeller is a twat 06/12/2018 at 16:42

0

Mostly lazy and inconsiderate.

DipodomysDeserti > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 17:12

0

I had the mother of all parking rivalries the last two years of running our print shop. Guys next to us kept parking their trucks in our spots until one of our guys finally got into it with one of their guys. Then one of their guys ran into one of our guys while they were leaving the parking lot. Good times.

His Stigness > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 17:47

1

Haha that’s hilarious! Did they see you put the signs up, or did you do it first thing in the morning?

HammerheadFistpunch > His Stigness 06/12/2018 at 17:48

0

They probably saw me.

His Stigness > HammerheadFistpunch 06/12/2018 at 17:54

0

I wonder if that helped. Perhaps you have an air of authority that caused them to not second guess your intentions.

TheRealBicycleBuck > Chariotoflove 06/12/2018 at 18:51

1

Our friend’s son has SMA and has been in a wheelchair his entire life. Dealing with douchey parkers is a daily ordeal for them. They live in a college town, so it’s not just douchey people, it’s also young ignorant drivers. The kids should  know better, but they don’t.

Chariotoflove > TheRealBicycleBuck 06/12/2018 at 19:30

0

Oh, self-centered college kids can be the absolute worst. Your friend has my sympathy. I’ve often thought about keying a handicap symbol on the doors of offenders like a vigilante handicap Zorro. My wife can be such a killjoy sometimes.

shop-teacher > Chariotoflove 06/12/2018 at 23:08

1

No, that’s not petty. They all deserve a swift and severe beating.

TheRealBicycleBuck > Chariotoflove 06/12/2018 at 23:52

1

Alternate approach:

Quick and easy, should wash right off.

Chariotoflove > TheRealBicycleBuck 06/13/2018 at 00:04

1

Oooo, I may have to treat myself for Father’s Day.

pip bip - choose Corrour > HammerheadFistpunch 06/13/2018 at 06:40

0

awesome win!

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > HammerheadFistpunch 06/13/2018 at 13:34

1

This is a beautiful thing you’ve done.